Washington and Oregon

I grew up in one and LB grew up in the other. Seattle is where my mangled roots of a family began (and ended for me) and Portland is that for LB. We are PNW people at heart, but hate the rain so we will never live there full-time again. In spite of my rainy weather phobia, I know every back road south of Seattle and LB's got the whole I-5 corridor on lock. Canby and Salem are the places where we spend Christmases because it is too much for me to be back in Seattle sometimes (honestly, 99% of the time). I instantly get all anxious whenever I go home-- there is just too much pain/sadness/anger/confusion there for me. As Ashley said when we were in Washington for my brother's funeral, "There is no healing left here for you to do."  And yet, to have two school shootings in my two states within a week of each other, leaves me feeling all the more anxious/sad about going "home" for my bridal shower this weekend. By the time you read this, I will have flown into Seattle, driven down to Portland, and be gearing up for the final hour drive down to Salem for the shower. At the rate things are going, it is highly possible that by the time you read this, there will be another innocent taken from a sacred place: a school. Why is this not more unsettling for us? Kids killing kids. KILLING. MURDERING. Taking away people's babies. I used to be a teacher in a pretty rough school. Heck, I even had an eighth grader look me straight in the eye from down the hallway and tell one of my students, "I am gonna kill that white b*tch." And yet, I showed up to teach everyday because my kids needed me to. Even though there were days when I was afraid. Even though a few kids were already gang involved and, in Arizona, almost all of their parents had guns.

I've read two blog posts this week where mommas pray that it not be their kids. Is that enough? Is it enough to pray that it is not your kid when ALL OF US, every single one of us, will have to send our babies to school one day? When there are teachers who go into classrooms EVERYDAY facing this fear?

I am not answering the myriad of questions in this post because to do so would require a level of intelligence and insight that I do not possess. And not just because I am not a momma yet. But because somehow, kids being shot at school turns into a gun debate instead of a national travesty and a cohesive call to action. It is not political in the same way that health care is not political (what a loaded word, political).

The question really is this 1990s gem: what would Jesus do about kids shooting kids and what would Jesus do about health care? Religion aside, do we or do we not have a moral obligation to take care of EVERYONES babies, momma, dads, and grandmas? Do we have an obligation to do everything we can to keep EVERYONES babies safe regardless of the personal "sacrifice" that might require of you?

I end this post acknowledging that it is rambly and covers a lot of ground, but this is what happens when I am faced with going to Washington. It hits me like a shock and the shootings on top of that just pile on to the amount of self-reflection and rambling that occurs.

Same Love-- Gay Marriage

This music video reduced me to tears a few weeks ago and I just cannot stop listening to the song and watching the video. Thus, it is blog-worthy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hlVBg7_08n0

Also, here are the lyrics:

"Same Love"

When I was in the third grade I thought that I was gay ‘Cause I could draw, my uncle was, and I kept my room straight I told my mom tears rushing down my face She’s like “Ben you've loved girls since before pre-k tripping,” Yeah, I guess she had a point, didn’t she? Bunch of stereotypes all in my head. I remember doing the math like, “Yeah, I’m good at little league” A preconceived idea of what it all meant For those that liked the same sex Had the characteristics The right wing conservatives think it’s a decision And you can be cured with some treatment and religion Man made rewiring of a predisposition Playing god, aw nah here we go America the brave still fears what we don’t know And god loves all his children, is somehow forgotten But we paraphrase a book written thirty-five-hundred years ago I don’t know

And I can’t change Even if I tried Even if I wanted to I can't change Even if I try Even if I wanted to My love My love My love She keeps me warm She keeps me warm She keeps me warm She keeps me warm

If I was gay, I would think hip-hop hates me Have you read the YouTube comments lately "Man, that’s gay" gets dropped on the daily We become so numb to what we’re saying A culture founded from oppression Yet we don’t have acceptance for ‘em Call each other faggots behind the keys of a message board A word rooted in hate, yet our genre still ignores it Gay is synonymous with the lesser It’s the same hate that’s caused wars from religion Gender to skin color, the complexion of your pigment The same fight that led people to walk outs and sit ins It’s human rights for everybody, there is no difference! Live on and be yourself When I was at church they taught me something else If you preach hate at the service those words aren’t anointed That holy water that you soak in has been poisoned When everyone else is more comfortable remaining voiceless Rather than fighting for humans that have had their rights stolen I might not be the same, but that’s not important No freedom till we’re equal, damn right I support it

And I can’t change Even if I tried Even if I wanted to My love My love My love She keeps me warm She keeps me warm She keeps me warm She keeps me warm

We press play, don’t press pause Progress, march on With the veil over our eyes We turn our back on the cause Till the day that my uncles can be united by law When kids are walking ‘round the hallway plagued by pain in their heart A world so hateful some would rather die than be who they are And a certificate on paper isn’t gonna solve it all But it’s a damn good place to start No law is gonna change us We have to change us Whatever god you believe in We come from the same one Strip away the fear Underneath it’s all the same love About time that we raised up

And I can’t change Even if I tried Even if I wanted to I can't change Even if I try Even if I wanted to My love My love My love She keeps me warm She keeps me warm She keeps me warm She keeps me warm Love is patient Love is kind Love is patient Love is kind (I‘m not crying on Sundays) Love is patient (I‘m not crying on Sundays) Love is kind (I‘m not crying on Sundays) Love is patient (I‘m not crying on Sundays) Love is kind

This song captures my exact feelings about this issue/dilemma. I refuse to call it a conflict because it seems to simple to me: just because you find something icky or you do not understand it, does not mean that you get the right to legislate about it. I hate that I just tagged this post under politics, because, really, it is not political. It is real life. Real love. Same love.

I am excited about the progress that has been made in the last few years in the area of equal rights, but know that there is much work to be done.